Now that New Year's has passed, and those of us with bowl teams are either standing, mouth agape at our failure or deluding ourselves that a win will translate into success next season -- I wanted to take this time to let some people know that I'm sorry.
Apparently the content of this year's Christmas cards has caused some befuddlement out there. Let me just say that I did what I did in hopes of entertaining you, and most importantly, in hopes of screwing things up so badly that my wife will never make me write season's greetings again.
We all enjoy opening up a card with a sacred scene or a merry little design. Few people expect the inside to contain a commentary on their son's tatoo collection. Or include wishes that they don't die anytime soon or that their dogs avoid gas.
I understand the surprise at this happy time of year. So, let me just say that, above all, IT WAS A FREAKIN' JOKE. GET OVER IT.
And that I'm sorry.
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4 comments:
Apologize?!! No need to apologize. It was genius. F'em if they can't take a joke. I don't remember specifically what was on it, but I remember chuckling about it and thinking something like; "I'm glad he's getting more care-free these days, because the humor is starting to flow as a result." Keep using these "sacred" days (Xmas, funerals, weddings) to shock your audience. That's when it's best.
Your clever attempt to avoid holiday card duty next year has failed. Start preparing a blurb now.
Dave T says
I don't know. I kind of liked mine. I'm sure there were a lot worse things you could say about me....
My wife, having a polar opposite sense of humor from mine, got the mail and opened the card and looked seriously confused for about 5 minutes trying to make sense of what you said. She handed the card to me and I immediatey laughed my ass off. I just told her, "it's a Sandy thing, you wouldn't understand."
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