Found out last night that Robert Jordan died.
Chances are, if you thought "Lord of the Rings" was lame and can't handle any movies that feature dudes swinging their swords, you have no idea who he was.
And on second thought, even if you don't think those things, but you don't seriously think the opposite of those things I just mentioned, you probably have no idea.
Now, before I confuse myself even more, I'll just say that Jordan is the author of the "Wheel of Time" series, a fantastically complicated fantasy series that now apparently will have no ending.
How nerdy? I recall reading a story a couple of years ago on the Abilene spelling bee champ. He won the local bee on the word "Telemon." Which he said he knew because "Telemon" is also a character in the "Wheel" series.
How complicated? The last book I read, I believe No. 9, spent 300 pages simply warming up.
Warming up, as in, checking in to see how one character was doing, and then moving on to the next 25 or so main characters to see how they were doing. Then he spent another 50 pages introducing you to a whole new set of about seven characters, all with extensive backgrounds and different goals ... And he never freakin' mentioned these people again in the whole damn book.
Anyhow, book 9 was where I bailed. I looked at all the plots and counter-plots and just felt that the rewards of investment were no longer worth the price of my time. And I was tired of the description, "She folded her arms under her breasts." That happened once every five paragraphs. I also got tired of scenes of naked women getting spanked.
Such is not my thang.
But, while sitting here in criticism, I'll say the first five books or so were a lot of fun. And a mountainously complicated feat of work. I still might go back some day and read the two I never got to.
I also admired Jordan the man -- went to military school, did a lot of things with his life, and was able to support himself writing fiction. That's a rare enough thing for someone to do, especially someone who writes about men on horseback charging the castle and women shooting death rays out of their fingers.
RIP
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Here's to Robert Jordan, who kept an astounding number of details straight in his head while writing a fantasy series on the scale of which I'd never read before. His heroes were kind of annoying and his heroines were gratifying strong (although sometimes harpy-like), but that's what made them believable. The Wheel of Time keeps turning.
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