Actual news from Hico

On my latest trip, I had a chance to peruse the mid-April edition of the Hico News-Review:

• For the third time in three years, proponents of a rule allowing the sale of alcohol in town (more or less) have successfully put the issue on the ballot. I was made aware of this by the appearance of three letters to the editor, all in opposition. No letters appeared in support. This is because anyone who did write a pro-beer letter can expect to called out on Sunday in front of the the Baptist or Church of Christ congregations. I don't want to think about what the Seventh-Day Adventists would do.
• Putty was trampled by a bull last month and is in recovery. We all wish him well.
• The Hico track and field team won a district championship. Coverage includes a picture of a hurdler who won gold, despite the fact that she jumps with both of her hands above her head.
• The editor of the paper broke a six-week stint (more or less) of writing columns that consisted of: "Sorry folks, too busy to put a column together this week." (His picture and by-line were still included.) His broke his silence to talk about Putty, and wishing him well.
• This is why I want to live there.